The capacity to be Alone is the capacity to Love. It may look paradoxical to you, but it is not. It is an existential truth; only those people who are capable of being Alone are capable of Love, of sharing, of going into the deepest core of the other person – without possessing the other, without becoming dependent on the other, without reducing the other to a thing, and without becoming addicted to the other. They allow the other absolute freedom, because they know that if the other leaves, they will be as happy as they are now. Their happiness can not be taken by the other, because it is not given by the other.
Last Wednesday night while strolling and enjoying alone time to lessen the weight on my mind. I wanted to give myself a nice treat, so I went to an ice cream shop and purchased a very nice ice cream with chocolate coat which was quiet expensive compared to how much I would have spent on a ice cream on a regular day but it was worth its price, mmm so yummy. In order to enjoy the ice cream and treat myself better, I took the less busy lane with few people and vehicles passing by and nothing to pollute the air and nature in particular.
As I strolled taking a bite of the ice cream, the wind blowing on my face and the sound it made, with nothing like aroma of a food to pollute how it smelled. I just kept smiling admiring all these while my phone played a soft music, indeed it was so beautiful and all what I needed and I felt so lighter like walking on the moon. I think its so far one of the best treat I have ever given myself aside wearing makeup on a sad day. LOL!
The word Alone means having no one else present but one’s self, while Lonely means without companions. Most people define these two words differently, some others think they are the same but they are not. Being Alone does not mean one is lonely, whereas being lonely does not mean one is Alone.
Being Alone is by choice and a way to reflect or think, which is a healthy thing to do since its an art of love. When you can be alone you can also be with others without using them as a mean of escape.
Loneliness does not come from having no people around you but from being unable to communicate the things that seem important to oneself. Which is why some people in relationships or married may surround themselves with love ones but will feel lonely or empty. We see people rushing and struggling to keep or cling to other people expecting them to make them happy in order not to feel lonely, but the fact is if you can not find happiness while alone or can not keep yourself happy, who else can.
Whoever yearns for happiness must first learn to be Alone without feeling Lonely. The world is full of plenty of interesting and enjoyable things to learn, things to do, just find any and do it just for the fun of it.
I enjoy time Alone so much almost everyday and it has become part of my life that I don’t even miss it. Even if its relaxing on my bed and imagining how it would be like having the ceiling printed with stars that glows when the room is dark or sitting next to my dog telling it stuffs it can barely understand. It can reading or playing music, the important thing is YOU and no one else.
Being Alone is when you get to love and appreciate yourself, get to know much about you, happy yourself and by so doing you wouldn’t expect someone to make you happy since you already know how to keep yourself that way.
Learn to be Alone and like it, there’s nothing more free and empowering than learning to love your own company. Do good stuffs for yourself, pamper yourself and know how great you are because you only learn much about yourself when you are Alone. Being Alone proves how independent you can be, how strong you are and ready to stand Alone even when the world says otherwise. The society may look down on it but you are not in to please society but You, because the most important thing to you is YOU.
My brother used to complain about how I eat breakfast especially when I’m not working in the morning, like a Queen. But I guess that is what I am, a QUEEN who loves to pamper herself because I can not trust anybody to do that better.
Just not Elizabeth but Adom!!!